At the end of 2 Corinthians 12, Paul, writing from a position of remove, writes the following of his potential upcoming visit to Corinth:
Are you thinking that I am trying to justify myself in your eyes? Actually I am speaking in Christ before God himself, and my only reason for so doing is to help you in your spiritual life. For I must confess that I am afraid that when I come I shall not perhaps find you as I should like to find you, and that you will not find me coming quite as you would like me to come. I am afraid of finding arguments, jealousy, ill-feeling, divided loyalties, slander, whispering, pride and disharmony. When I come, will God make me feel ashamed of you as I stand among you? Shall I have to grieve over many who have sinned already and are not yet sorry for the impurity, the immorality and the lustfulness of which they are guilty? (2 Corinthians 12:19-21)
Reading this, in its clearly negative tone, made me think of where we've been, in the (relatively) much more positive, as we've transited through these last few strange months. In all this time, rather than being together—at places like Anchor, church, out to coffee, out to lunch, etc.—we have all been living in varying degrees of isolation and remove.
And I remember saying to Jenny, about the middle of the first full week of the shutdown: "Well, now begins the battle of the inner life."
Is that how you've found it to be, too? As a battle to win the battlefield of your heart and mind? As a time to fight the feelings of desperation and, instead, to present your inner life as a ready place for communion with Jesus?
Indeed, reading through this Chapter 12 conclusion this week, I've been hearing Paul's words in a different way:
All this time, we have had ample opportunity to dig down deep into the realities of our forever-finished justification. Christ Himself, God Himself, has been leaning forward to speak to us personally; His only reason for so doing is to establish His spiritual life in us. For He professes that He’s always delighted to come to us and to make us into the people He should like to find us being, and I guarantee that, when His presence is fully manifest, we will find Him even better than we'd hoped He could be. He will come to end all argument, all human need for comparison, hatred, division, lying speech, rumor-milling, pride and disharmony--within us. And when He comes, He will be so proud of our inviting Him to come! He will wipe the every tear from our eyes, remind us of our perfect freedom from sin—eradicating all guilt and shame—and He will teach us of the glory of His Way and of the righteousness He’s already imputed to us.
Friends, isn’t Jesus wonderful?